Wednesday, 25 July 2012

Hands and Feet

It has been such a lonnnngggg time since I last pampered myself by doing manicure and pedicure!

I also did half leg waxing today. It really feels good to have a "me" time.

Colours, colours and more colours!

No more hair!


Today in court I wanted to get into the cell and take picture from the outside, pretending to be an inmate. Just before my other foot lands into the cell, my colleague immediately pulled my arm and said " You crazy a, where got people wanna go inside and take picture. Pantang. Wanna take, take from outside!"

Oh.. LOL. He said nobody wants to be a prisoner. Rule No.1 never step into a cell so as to prevent yourself from being a prisoner. Rule No. 2, never step into the accused dock as you do not want to get charged in court for an offence.

I was amazed by his warnings as such superstitions have never hit my mind. Well no harm to adhere by it! Its for my own good after all.

So tadaa, me standing outside the temporary cell to hold the "criminals" in court building.

This is me and my colleague resting ourselves before meeting begins. Lol.

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Saturday, 21 July 2012


I am now an ugly duckling..


Sigh.. Having skin break outs problem. Been having a lot of meeny tiny whiteheads all over my face. Well, its not that bad if you ignore it as it can only been seen under well lit places. Only myself could feel the bumpy texture on my skin..

So I'm back to consult skin specialist again, but a different one from my usual specialist.

Am prescribed the same medication, Proaccutane RM200 a box for 30 capsules, which lasts me a month.

Gosh, why am I being blessed with such a "good" skin..

After going for facial, my face became like this..

And this is before..

Gosh *screams*

Acne acne please go away..

Breathe in, breathe out.. Mirror Mirror on the wall, who is the fugliest of all?


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Congratulations dear!

Truly happy for you and am sorry that I couldn't make it to your big day.. ;(

All of you looked stunningly gorgeous!!! I'm the only missing person in this picture.. Sigh. Damn sad.

Another close friend of mine at work is getting married soon as well. He proposed today and she agreed! Awww.. Congrats dearsss!!!

Seems like people around me is getting married one by one. It reminds me about how I've always wanted to get marry at the age of 26, walking down the aisle in pink wedding gown. Haha, well this thought have long been tossed into the bin.. It was a dream.. and sad to say I couldn't realise this dream..

Happily ever after, tagline for most of the disney princess show. Fairytale love, like the one in Enchanted. That's what I've always believe in.

I used to get upset when I see people around me is getting married, putting pressure on myself thinking when will I be the lucky bride. With a great diamond ring to be offered to me. Well answer is the more you think about it, the more depressing it gets.

Without expectation there will not be disappointment. When it comes it comes. Its all beyond your control. For all you know, you might not get married for the rest of your life. I've even told my brother to take care of me if I don't get to find a husband for myself! And he said yea he will keep a room for me in his future house.. Lol. So sweet.

Live a happy life and stop worrying about marriage. I believe everything is destined.

To all the married couples and soon to be married, all the best!

;) good night! I've learned to reorganise my life, to reset my priorities. You must have a target in life in order to move on.

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Tuesday, 10 July 2012


I posted on my Facebook status "Slowly sinking into the state of depression.."

I realised I have changed. I could feel myself emanating strong negative aura. I lose temper easily nowadays, at anyone and everyone.

When you draw negative "chi" to yourself, ultimately everything around you will collapse, one by one as a result of your negative thinking.

When I'm depressed, I ever thought of committing suicide, being the weakling, always thinking that death is the easiest way out from any problem. Well, truth is it doesn't work that way.

When I had relationship problem 2 years ago, I actually contemplated jumping down from 16th floor or alternatively, slit my wrist. Just like what you usually see in the movie. Hahaha in the end, my body's reaction to depression is "cry". Crybaby I was for most of the time I'm depressed. I'm grateful that I've been granted the ability to cry easily when I'm down. By crying I get to release my emotions and not suppress it within myself.

A friend of mine had recently committed suicide...jumping down from 16th floor from an apartment in Ara Damansara. I was literally shattered when I heard the news. He used to be a good friend of mine, he was my ex boyfriend back then in high school. The puppy love kind. Rumours had said that he was too stressed up with his life and was financially indebted. His friends and families were greatly devastated by the incident. Everyone was in sorrow and pain.

From then on, I realised ending your life is not the best solution. You will inflict pain and injuries to those who care about you.

Nowadays am feeling lonely. There's office politics and at work, I could hardly find lunch mate anymore. Those whom I'm close with will either be out of office or on diet. So I eat alone. Maggi mee most of the time.. After lunch I will be at my work desk resuming whatever pending work that I have until I leave office.

Last time whenever I reached home, I will hear the sounds of TV in the living room, with dad and mum busy doing their routine activities ie dad watching TV/sleep and mom busy preparing dinner. Now, I come home to an empty house, with no one there to greet me and no dinner. Mom and dad have been frequenting Genting Highland casino almost daily. The thought of dad injuring his toes worries me. Furthermore he has vision problem. Being on a high ground reduces the oxygen intake to your body and lack of oxygen is the root cause of most of the illness, especially for diabetics. I tried to convey this message to him numerous times but they just wouldn't listen. Furthermore I'm afraid that they will succumb to gambling addiction.

Each day when they get home, I refuse to talk to them. Worse I even raised my voice at them. After eating I just hid myself in the room. That leads me to loneliness..

Emptiness and loneliness is what I feel. I just can't live alone.. What should I do with my life? Most of the time I'm pretty occupied with my work, I don't have the time to hang out with my friends.

I'm really a loser and useless.

Thursday, 5 July 2012


Weee mandarin teacher treat us qiaokeli!

Xie Xie Lao Shi!!!

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